Digital Hive

Cocaine (the drink) Bust!

Last fall I was squawking about my close encounter with Cocaine (the drink) and I voiced my displeasure about the name. I am still not the Church Lady, but I still think it is the lamest marketing ploy out there.

Well just 8 short months later, according to this CNN.com story, Cocaine (the drink) is being pulled from the shelves.

The Food and Drug Administration issued a warning letter last month that said (manufacturer) Redux was illegally marketing the drink as a street drug alternative and a dietary supplement. May 4 was the deadline for the company to respond.

The FDA cited as evidence the drink's labeling and Web site, which included the statements "Speed in a Can," "Liquid Cocaine" and "Cocaine -- Instant Rush." The company says Cocaine contains no drugs and is marketed as an energy drink. It has been sold since last August in at least a dozen states.

The manufacturer had this to say about the product positioning:

"Of course, we intended for Cocaine energy drink to be a legal alternative the same way that celibacy is an alternative to premarital sex," (Clegg Ivey, a partner in Redux Beverages) Ivey said.

He did not just spew that line.  Did he?  If that is the clear-headed thinking that can only come from an "energy" drink, I think it might be time pull then plug from the refrigerator case. People, step away from the straw.

You Can Take the New Yorker Out of New York, but....

  A funny thing happened on the way to work this morning: I passed an ad, read it, and was suddenly struck by the fact that it felt totally incongruous to be seeing it during my morning commute. I couldn't shake the feeling that something was suddenly out of place in the Universe. And then....in dawned on me. I was seeing a Citibank ad on the streets of Boston, alerting me to the presence of their branches nearby.

Now, if you've ever spent any period of time living in New York, the ubiquitous Citibank ad on the side of a phone booth is part of the streetscape. They're so prevalent that they're easy to ignore. And yet, I became so accustomed to seeing them that at some point during my years in the city, they became a part of my spatial memory - a familiar reference point in a vast landscape.

So, what does this have to do with marketing? Well, beyond the fact that my ad recall would make any marketer gleeful, I can think of three good lessons:

1) Consistency breeds familiarity: It's the same campaign they've been running for years - if they'd messed with it, they would have lost the visual cues that caught my attention in the first place.

2) Campaign as brand equity: That simple campaign IS the brand, at least for this banker.

3) Context matters: They took something that was familiar to me in another place and time (and period of my life) and inserted it into a totally different context. Are there many former New Yorkers who had the same reaction? Dunno. But, it's a good reminder that - even with advertising - seeing the unexpected and the out-of-place can make us pay attention.

When is an "upgrade" damaging to your brand?

I received an offer in the mail to "upgrade" my plain old Chase credit card to a Chase PRESTIGE credit card. Since I am passionate about reading all junk mail direct mail offers, I opened the envelope and read with amusement about 18 valuable benefits if only I would cough up $79 annually to a company called The Reunion Group (Read the Chase case study.) In fine print at the bottom of the "congratulations" note is a line notifying the reader that

"The Reunion Group is the exclusive provider of Chase Prestige Card Services and assumes responsibility for the provision of, or failure to provide (emphasis mine), services. Chase and The Reunion Group are not affiliated."

Nowhere in the fine print is it made clear that this is $79 annually - in additional to Chase's annual fee.  (1/8/07 UPDATE: Actually, there was a buckslip that contained 6 pt. type explaining that the fee is in addtional to Chase's annual fee - but it is not on the offer letter.) JP Morgan Chase - what are you thinking? You are JP Morgan Chase. You are a brand-brand, and you have associated yourself with something seems a bit off. Let's delve shall we?

Cocaine (the drink)

At lunch today I walked past the Knowfat Lifestyle Grille and encountered a product demo for the controversial "energy drink" called Cocaine. 

I recently re-read David Armano's piece from July called Brand Affinity Through Stories + Experience because I have been pondering how companies and marketers make decisions on affinity products and associations (see Audi piece) and how they could make better connections - when the Cocaine controversy walked right up to me. 

On any day in downtown Boston you could partake in any number of product demos, so I wasn't certain that the Cocaine demo was associated with Knowfat.  It seemed like a strange attempt at affinity given Knowfat's mission statement (from their website):

"KnowFat! Lifestyle Grille promises to provide great tasting, nutritionally packed food and products to help you look good, feel good, and achieve optimal physical and mental performance."

Brand Cop: Retail bank busted for hostage-taking

The Defendant: The banker formerly known as Fleet

The Crime(s): Aggravated Telemarketing Assault, Hostage Marketing, Reckless Branding

While off-duty, the officer had to call his bank to activate new cards.  The reason for the new cards (there was nothing wrong with the old ones) is that we now have to start using the newly branded cards so we can expunge all memory of Fleet from the world.  I guess those guys over at thought it would be a good idea for everyone to get real up-close and cozy with the new brand.  I guess they were kind of hoping that the brand and brand cop would become good buddies. 

So, I called to activate my card and, instead of a rapid confirmation welcoming me to the new bank, I got marketed at for about 2 or 3 minutes.  Now, I know that is not very long, but I was pissed!  Bear in mind that I had two cards, so I had to go through this twice! I can't hang up until they confirm that my cards are activated and they are refusing to do that until they have pitched me some useless, value-free service....the message begins by trying to scare me into signing up, by pointing out how identity theft is on the rise and how their subscription service will protect me blah blah blah.  Just to compound the crime, when I pressed the "get lost" button the first time, they still did not let it go!  I had to listen to more drivel until finally I got the activation confirmation message.  Way to go guys!  The push-marketers response to the decline of push marketing is to assume you have permission to annoy people just because you have forced them to call you.  And the more they push, the more people get annoyed and tune out........

Original idea for brand cop inspired by Brian Sack's hilarious "Grammar Cop" found at Brian's site The Banterist. I would like to add that this is not an attempt to be as funny as Brian: such an attempt would be futile.